Growing Pains

I am being stretched, pulled, manipulated, and banged up all in the name of the Lord. At least I think.
You see, resigning from my job was not ever an option for me. One morning I woke up and felt the Lord was putting it heavy on my heart to resign and teach piano. I prayed fervently about this decision and felt completely at peace with it, as did Nick. However, our finances now are saying something quite different. We haven't been this strapped since grad school. We are still tithing faithfully and without question. To non-tithers I know this sounds crazy to think of giving money away when you are the poor family who needs it, but it is God's money and it is an act of obedience and faithfulness (thanks Becky for the awesome book we've learned so much from). No, this is not financially strapped, like "oh darn...meager Christmas this year". It's the kind of "oh crap, I hope we don't foreclose on our house".
With all the stuff going on with Nick's parents and the toll it's taking on him, it's any wonder he gets up in the morning. There is very minor drama in my family, fortunately it's all about reconciliation type things...that's a positive, just taxing.
It has always been a habit of mine to think that if I am being obedient to the Lord in an area, He will automatically bless that area (i.e., tithing, purity, etc.), but that isn't how it works...the blessing is supposed to come from being obedient. OUCH!
I have been crying out asking where God is in all of this, only to have it smack me upside the head yesterday that He is right here (duh!). If this is my "valley", then am I really complaining (this is nothing)! If I can't trust in the Lord during this time, how will I be able to when times are harder. It's so easy to love and praise Jesus when our lives are feeling blessed and full, how much more powerful and growing is it to do so when we are feeling stripped? This is an elementary concept, yet hard for me to keep in mind. I just got done sending Adde Jeremiah 29:11, when typing I realized how applicable it is to my own life right now. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. This verse pulled me through the hardest thing we've been through (losing the first baby) and look at the blessing that came afterwards!
So, in this season of growing and deepening of our faith, please pray for our attitudes towards Christ above all....and if you'd like you can pray we sell the boat or Ed McMahon shows up at our door.